Shoo fly

Shoo fly don't bother me, shoo fly don't bother me, shoo fly don't bother me or I will kill you dead.
 Not the right ending I know, but that's what we used to sing when we were being 'bothered' by flies at school
 Here in Australia we cant just have a few flies, we have to have billions of them. Black, tenacious, disgusting bush flies that fly in from Central Australia after hatching in the outback in some pile of cow shit. We even have a thing called the Australian salute, which is when you swat a fly away from your face. Serious, we call it that.
 Flies and mosquitoes are an integral part of our summer, they form part of the food chain from frogs and fish to birds and mammals. If these massive hatchings did not occur every year there would be a catastrophic imbalance in our ecosystem and yet knowing this doesn't make me want flies and mosquitoes around. In fact if I could kill every single one I would.
 All we need is a North Westerly wind blowing on a hot day and these filthy little pests come to town. If they just stuck to the cow shit that would be ok but on the way they stop off to dine at road kill and numerous town tips (waste dumps), sewerage works and who knows what else. So when one lands at the corner of your mouth or flies up your nose I would think it would be understandable to have a hissy fit.
Of course being Australia, we don't just have the little bush flies (bushies). Oh no - we also have what is affectionately known as the blowie, green bottle or blow fly and the March fly which is around all summer not just in March.  Where the bush fly will land on you and just keep on trying to get to your mouth and nose and driving you crazy the blowie will land on a dog crap nearby and eyeball you. You can feel them staring at you, as soon as you make eye contact the blowie will fly up and land on whatever you are about to eat.  
I used to love the story about the Emperor in China who ordered that everyone in China had to kill 7 flies a day until they rid the land of flies.  How cool would that be?
The March fly bites. It just loves to land on your ankle while you are guarding your food from the blowie and trying to keep the bushies out of your mouth. The first hint you have of impending doom is the light caress of six legs just brushing past your ankle. This happens about 3 or 4 times as the March fly does a reccy. Then just as a blow fly lands on your sandwich he swoops in and BANG. They draw blood if they get in a good bite.
We do have stuff here called Aeroguard which is a personal insect repellent, personally I think the flies use it as fuel because they don't seem to even notice it being on you. We may have to up the anti with napalm.